"Yet those who wait for the LORD will gain new strength; They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired, They will walk and not become weary." Isaiah 40:31
I am part of a women's small group and we are currently studying the Book of Esther (which, by the way, is such an interesting book of the Bible if you haven't read it. It's like a mini-novel with so many twists and turns!).
Today we were talking about how God's timing is perfect. Even though we know that as believers, it's still so hard sometimes.
It made me think back to when Chris and I were having problems getting pregnant. We were so ready to be parents and wanted a child so badly, but it just wasn't happening in "our time."
I prayed and prayed, and got really frustrated with God for not giving me this child that I so desperately wanted. Finally, after many prayers and many tears, I just surrendered to him. True surrender. Not as in, "Okay, God, I'm putting my trust in you," and then snatching it away like I had always done. I mean I truly put my trust in him. I realized that I would only get pregnant when he was ready for it to happen (and only if he wanted it to happen) and all of the worrying and frustration in the world wasn't going to help. Once I realized that and trusted him completely, he allowed us to get pregnant with Melissa and Ann Catherine. Not only that, but he blessed us down the road with Miss Lily.
I look back now and I can see he was trying to teach me something during "the waiting game." God had always planned to give us those children, the "desires of our heart," but he was trying to teach me a lesson about trusting him. And he knew good and well that I would never learn that lesson until he made me go through a valley where I absolutely had no other choice but to trust him. The only way I could learn this lesson was by waiting on him.
Sometimes God's answer isn't yes or no. Sometimes it's wait. And I'll be honest, sometimes that's harder than a flat-out no. It's just not in our DNA to wait. But, remember, God's timing is perfect. And in the midst of that wait, open your hearts and your minds to what he is trying to teach you. I assure you, there's a reason.
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3 comments:
Im trying so hard Amy, to just REALLY give it all to God. Its SO hard and I know you know this from your experience. I pray that God will just help me get to that point, I know he will be faithful!
Thank you Amy for this post, it brought me to tears cause this is so where I am at right now!
~Jennifer
Jennifer,
I am praying for you!! I know how hard this wait is - and the not knowing - but I know that God is in control. You hang in there!!
Amy
I just found your blog today through Jennifer's and I can't wait to read older posts.
I so needed this post just to remind me of how good God's timing is.
My husband and I had 2 early miscarriages and I was so angry at God when it happened, it was not my plan, waiting on children was not my plan.
But God began to speak a new vision into our hearts. He led us to 2 beautiful little girls from Guatemala who needed a mommy and daddy as much as we wanted to be a mommy and daddy. After a year long process, we brought our girls home on August 21st 2008. In January 2009 God showed me that NOW is His time and we are expecting our 3rd child in September.
If I had kept trying to do things in my time, we would have missed out on the blessing that God gave us in our daughters.
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